Thursday, March 10, 2011

Striping in the court house

       **"If I ever see a dog wearing a Snuggie, I'm going to kill it, cause that's what I think the dog would want me to do." ---Ron White**

   ** Jb's Worker:  "Do these pants make me look fat?"  Coco Rock star:  "No but your ass does!"**

    Flashback----to last month.   I had a job interview or something to dress up for.  I had rigged a pair of dress pants with a fake -no sew button and some were downtown while trying to catch a bus, the button disappeared.  As I was holding my pants up, walking in the heart of downtown, I decided to see what the local retail store had to offer my dilemma.  I found some ugly belts, but they were cheap.  And not wanting to waste my cash--I tried it on in the store.   Needless to say, I was being monitored by at least one worker and one manager. 
     Yesterday, I was wearing the same pants and went into the courthouse.   Eventually both court houses.   In my long time with no drivers licence, I tend to collect traffic tickets.  For a long time now, I just keep moving instead of paying things off.  And some how seem to owe quite a bit in three states now.  Including this one.   To avoid jail time for a traffic bench warrant, and to some day soon acquire my licence again, I decided it was time to start paying them off.   This all started at the court house. 
    As I was nearing the metal detector, I realized several things.  First that I have in the past been angry enough at some court receptionists I could see why security was important.  And second that taking my belt off could lead to a wardrobe malfunction.  As I was  taking my belt off, I briefly explained the true importance of my belt that day, and apologized ahead of time if he were to see a full moon inside the court house. 
     I managed to get through the metal detector without setting off any alarms or having my pants hanging around my ankles.  For several reasons, I did not really want to give the court my real address.   And had a whole glorious plan to were the cops would show up a former neighbors of mine, who had overly wronged me in the past.  She would have been overly annoyed to have the cops show up at her door, and than ask for me.   Sadly they did not even ask for my address.  In this case I was considered a low threat and my fees have all since gone to collections.   But sadly enough on my karma, I was overly disappointed that they I could not give them HER address. 
    Sadly on Sunday we change our clocks once again.   I say sadly, because whatever we do to the clock hands, we lose an hour of sleep.  Luckily if we do it right at our house, the kids go to bed an hour earlier  without even noticing.   This was one of the few things I enjoyed about living in Arizona.   They never change the clocks for daylight savings crap-o-la!    Of course when living there I never knew what time it was any were else that relatives lived.
   Today I answered a Craigs List posting for a part time dish washer job.  It was a little mom a pop restaurant, with pop as the interviewer.   What was an instant shock to me was that about 28 people showed up.   There was three times as many job hopefuls, as customers actually eating thier.   I guess I had not realized how bad the job market really is here right now.  It's scary.   In Wyoming, if you can pass a pee test, you can almost pick  your job.   But with that, most people do not want to live there long.   Those hiring must love this.   Tons of potential workers to choose from, even for the most lowly jobs.   The longer I search and or beg at this point for even the lowest of jobs if it was a good economy  and can't help but feel more and more useless.   As one past co-worker put it--- " It's NOT that you're useless....It's just that there are STILL very few jobs out there....And THEY know that....So they can be assholes WHILE they're hiring, Not just afterwards...."    Of course he has worked at Wally World forever so knows about A holes on every angle of the word.  He might also have no self esteem left! 

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