Friday, April 10, 2015

Today Marks Post 599---Wow!

         As today's title might imply--this page has been around for awhile.  And I am quickly nearing 600 posts.   Almost with enough material to fill one normal sized post.  I hope the journey has often made you laugh more than I do when I wake up in the morning, and stare into our large mirror in the bathroom.  Probably the reason we had no mirrors in our last house.  Tomorrow I switched my work schedule.  Not sure if it was the best idea, because I seem to make great tip money working mornings, but I do not have to start work until 2pm, so can sleep in on a Saturday!   Or sit around in my pj's and watch cartoons and eat Coco Puffs.   What will probably actually end up happening, is that my wife and I will sneak off to some garage sales. 

    **STONERS--  the only thing that bakes at room temperature."**

       **"I am still haunted by the things I did for a Klondike Bar."**

            **"I always go the extra mile, the restraing order says I have too!"**----Because of some great people in this small town, our whole family has dealt with restraining orders a lot---so I thought this quote was extra made for me.  Cliff notes, restraining orders are not as fun as they seem. 

     Today's mini rant is about all the people that use the wrong doors at Wally World----especially the workers. We are usually "greeted" by a large amount of workers going out the entrance door on a mission to smoke. I know this seems little---but the doors are clearly labeled for your connivance and for customer flow. And of course the workers should know what door is what. Although I often tell my bosses that if I could read I would have a real job. On the same note---- why is ...walking through a store such a hard concept for people?? Just walking in general. Not to mention how many isles are blocked by a sideways cart and a whole family standing around the cans of beans deciding what can to purchase. My wife has medical issues walking, and still can maneuver through any box store better than 95 percent of the customers. In fact she is about to start teaching walking lessons while shopping if anyone is interested?

       I posted the above on a local page of mine  and am still getting flax about it.   Mostly revolving around how the World is full of much bigger issues.  True  but many of the worlds bigger issues are caused by the same people that would point this out, and by people that can not use the correct doors.   But what do I know.

    Last night my wife and I and a few friends ventured to the local bar and actually had a grand old time.  We do not venture out much in this town.  For one, we find we have few friends that do not just want stuff from us.  We live across the street from a bar--something that should be every mans dream, but it is a dive bar.  Not to be confused with a dyke bar, although that could very well be as entertaining.   The bar owner tries hard, but it just is not a nice place to hang out.  And mostly the thrill at this bar is to see who can stand out back in the patio, and yell the loudest.  And who can pound the other into the ground the hardest and fastest.  I have issues with many people in this town --when I am sober, so going to this bar and being surrounded by angry drunks, does not seem like a good Friday night.   The bar up the street is much more layed back and a huge area.   We had an amazing time.   Although I was kind of surprised that I saw them card no customers the entire night.   I know this is a small town and all, but they can't possibly know for sure all of the occupants were legal.   Obviously since last time I was in court, one of the bars bartenders was also in court, for serving a minor.  Anyways a quick thought about last night---I am always kind of amazed how many people drunk or other wise will hit on my wife ---right in front of me.   I realize every day  that I married up and she is beyond beautiful and sexy but Hello, I am right there!   I believe there is a Seinfield episode about all this, so I wont expand on this to deep.   But it happens to us all of the time.  Not just in bars by far.  It should make me happy beyond belief, because I know no matter what tired line they use, she is coming home with me.  But the fact that so many guys do it right in front of me  remains shocking.   I guess I just need to bulk up my body a lot, so that it at least does something to the would be suitors when I stare at them with my arms crossed. 

So I use the word DURP a lot in my blog page.
And have an every increasing number of people that make it on my list as being top
I thought it was my word   in fact a few of us came up with the anagram at work several years ago.
Dim-witted Urban Redneck Parloe
but an alert reader on anther page of mine Googled it and found definitions to the word even.
From  the Urban Dictionary: " 1. One of the many sounds that retards make.

2. The sound you might make when imitating someone that just did something retarded (see #1).

3. What you might call someone that just did something really stupid

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