Geezers To Coffee

Three reasons to stand up:
1. To get the remote
2. To go to the bathroom
3. Because you're the real slim shady

 

**"When selling a vacuum cleaner is it helpful to say it really sucks?"**----

I recently posted this on a local buy/sell page  mainly to lighten the mood a little bit.

And because I have a vacuum to sell.  

I also received many better ways to state the above.

When I worked at Wally World-I was presented with this "issue" many a day while working in the housewares department.   Because this could easily mean it cleans up very well, or it

does not work well at all and is a huge waste of money.

I guess the cliff notes are---although sucks is a very fun word to say

the less you say it around actual customers the better.

 

 

     So last Sunday afternoon our oldest and I meet the local old geezer security crew for one of the RV parks.   We were walking the dogs in the middle of the desert.  And just past the open desert area we were in, is a  whole seating area complete with a very comfy bench.   Apparently --the 4 people in 2 golf carts that zoomed up to us were not the welcoming crew! Butch -our new pit bull kept them from getting to close, or to loud for that matter. According to the angry blue hairs--and the keep out signs--we were trespassing. I guess I should be glad they didn't have guns in there golf carts. The only things in the area are a comfy bench-a metal in ground BBQ-and a picnic table so I am not sure what they were protecting.  When the guy first asked why we were on the property--I said our dogs got loose and I was getting them--when they got uptight again--I asked if they wanted me to leave the dogs there... lol The dogs did not like the old people yelling. I tried to paint y'all a picture of it with my words, because I have no pictures of all of this.   I do believe one of the non welcoming comity would have slapped the camera out of my hands, if I had tried to take pictures.  They were mean.      On a side note--I am going to sneak back to the area next week and leave a can of Geritol, Metamucil, and prune juice on the table.  If I am extra sneaky and stealth--I can wait in the surrounding trees and get pictures of there reactions when they find the gifts!  Of course that would require there being actual trees here-beyond palm trees.  Do it all official like on National Geographic, when they are tracking animals.   So many snow birds come here--I could make a fortune filming such fun.  And than my youngest could jump out of the trees--yelling, "Kabozal!" or something.   He does that anyway.   Wait---no!   I am not giving any geezers mouth to mouth.    I know  --I know this is teaching the kids bad habits.  But they are already destined to be sarcastic pricks.  I did go over the importance of staying off of other peoples property--after this.   Especially in Arizona, were everyone has guns, and almost everyone is angry.  

 

 

 

 

New word after Exploring our bank account.

Or someone that has already used Obamacare.

 

 

I have found this is much more productive than facing it towards the  TV.

But of course you have to have a liquor cabinet.

 

 

Wise indeed.

But I am sure all of the belongings inside the trailer are safe. 

Wait were is the trailer!?

 

As I sit here drinking more coffee---I realize how many of my ideas come from coffee consumption.

And how many blog posts are a direct result of this. 

Another way of saying, it is now time for my daily coffee plugs!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So many blog posts in the works!

We have been very busy snapping pictures and Exploring in the last few weeks.

Plus I have a whole list of local places to Explore!

 

 

                                                              MY blog rundown
Some of my better pictures end up here: http://exploreb-ham.blogspot.com/
My newest page all about Arizona and what it has to offer everyone! http://exarizonagobensonbobcats.blogspot.com/
My longest running blog series. Full of random rambling, Exploring, jokes, rants, and of course coffee love! http://wyomingjack.blogspot.com/

 

 

Black & Blue Friday!

             **"I have measured out my life in coffee spoons."**------   Is this so bad??

Right now my Monday's are my Fridays at work.

But I still like coffee!

    For more fun, during the holidaze, the isles get smaller and smaller---full of gifts.


      I have written about Black Friday before.  And it's mass ridiculousness.  We as a nation spend Turkey Day being thankful, and than go out in masses the very next day, and pound and trample each other for a $2.00 DVD, no one wants to ever watch.  This year saw an entire weeksend of shopping, wahoo!   This meant that families did not have to spend time together, and workers in the retail world were forced into the same fate. 

  I have worked at Wally World for eight Black Fridays--and can say that consuming massive amounts of coffee defiantly helps one deal with the masses!   My working daze usually included starting work at 4 AM.  I was not before aware that there was a 4 AM, but I try to learn something new every day.   I would prepare for the extra long day by just putting a straw in my coffee pot.   Pouring the entire coffee pot over your head is also advised.  It will wake you up super fast, and prepare you for the customer onslaught and possible beating you will receive all day long.   I am not going to go into the mass craziness much here today, you can go online and watch fights galore from Black Friday.  Most of the worse scenes are from Wally World stores again this year.  So congrats to those shoppers!  Being the most downloaded You-Tube videos, is your five minutes of fame!

    Working Black Friday as a server is possibly the worse day of the year.  Especially if you work  the breakfast shift.   All of your customers have been up all night, they are angry, many have black eyes, and they want to tell you about all the money they have spent.  Because they have spent all of that cash, saving cash, they do not have any left to actually tip you for serving them.  Today I start with a comical view of the crazy day.  And than I might throw in some war stories from my daze at Wally World.   I say war stories, because we really should have received hazard pay. 

                Just to put things in perspective, at least you were not this woman!  

Start planning now for next year.....

   **  The line in front of the retail store was amazingly large this Black Friday.  One man rolled up his sleeves, and started climbing over the crowd.  He made it quite a ways, before the crowd worked as a group, and shoved him to the end of the line, were he belonged.  He tried again, with more gusto.  But did not make it much closer to the door, before getting thrown to the ground.  One more attempt got him very close to the retail stores front door.  But alas, still he was moved to the back of the now even longer line.   "I am going to attempt this one more time, and if these people do the same thing, I am not going to unlock the store doors today!"  The store manager announced out loud.**

     Back in the days--when Wal Mart's actually closed, and were not all open 24/7 to be sure and suck all of the cash out of peoples pocket books, we would have lines wrapped around the store of shoppers ready for deals on Black Friday.  One year we reportedly had 4000 people at the front door.  The managers would unlock the doors and get the heck out of the way.  As the masses spilled in.    If you were a cashier, you could watch all the action from relative safety.  With the register as a buffer between you and the wild crowds.   

     Now the stores are open all of the time.  So people camp out and wait for the best deals to be wheeled out of the back of the store.  If you are one of these "shoppers" and I use that term loosely.   Make sure your key item is from electronics.  That way you can lounge and watch TV!   The furniture section is usually located across from electronics, so you can pull up a bean bag chair!  Don't knock it, these chairs are amazingly comfortable.  

     One year, last time the evil Furby was a super hot toy, that was the item everyone had to have. And of course each store got exactly 50,000 less than they needed to fill peoples shopping lists.  Anyways, at some point --while we workers were hiding in the the back of the store, we found an entire pallet of the evil toy.   We wheeled them to sporting goods, and paged out that we had found more of the "great" Furby.  None of us were expecting the huge crowd that showed up in the middle of sporting goods.  For added fun, a couple of us workers jumped on top of the sporting goods counter, and started chucking the toys into the large crowd.  It was great fun watching the customers maul each other.  Much like watching gals fight over the flowers at any large wedding.  Except that we got to experience this multiple times.  Later we got disciplined by management--but it was well worth it!  More Wally World stories soon!   I above use words like "evil" because the Furby is again VERY popular this year.   And my wife and daughter both want one.   ;)   Seems like any easy task, but they are as hard to find, as the orginal ones now are.

Next post---some thoughts on Turkey Day!

And of course lots of random rambling. 

Please don't forget to check out my other blog post--

All about Exploring Bellingham Washington.

Full of fun and pictures!

http://exploreb-ham.blogspot.com

http://exploreb-ham.blogspot.com