Quickie
I am also easily entertained. Although it is usually shiny objects that distract me. I blame this all on growing up in Wyoming. A big but boring and densely populated state.
**"Hey girl with 20,000 tweets and 14 followers, I'm guessing you should probably shut up!"**
It took me a long time to convert to using Facebook, and now I often feel that I need an intervention from the sight. I am always amazed how many people read my mindless status postings. Most do not respond, but when I see them around town, they mention a post from weeks ago. I have a lot of posts, and now attempt to keep them upbeat and as entertaining as possible. At least what I call entertaining. People seem to take posts to the extreme and tell everyone every move they make. These people should stick with Twitter. A sight I have never had the urge to join or visit. Telling the world how many customers I have each hour or how many squares of TP it took me to use after using the restroom, is putting me to sleep just writing it down.
**"Reading popular baby names. Once again, Adolf is nowhere to be found."**
I have learned through the years when a gal comes up to you and says "Guess what!?" not to automatically guess that they are pregnant. Wait till at lest your third or fourth guess, to guess this. This rule seems to apply if you know the lady well or not. Really applies if you are dating the gal.
**"Judging by his physique, I'd guess Popeye's a pretty accomplished masturbator."**
Watch that first step!
**"You think you've got problems? I dropped my cocaine in the snow this morning."**
**"I always want to be friends with the people that need shopping carts at the liquor store. I bet those people are fun."**
**"Restrooms now have auto flushes, taps, hand dryers. But isn't it silly that you cancel all that by touching the door handle on your way out?"**
**"Vegetarians must hate themselves because they're made of meat."**
**"Nothing Burps better than bacon!"**
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