Saturday, October 15, 2011


     So a few week ago I ended up in Billings, mostly to eat real food, but also a lot to just get out of this small town and enjoy my daze off work a little more.  I get to break away and head up to the big city again on Monday.  Before Monday's trip, I thought I should share a little about the last trip. Growing up in the sticks, we ended up in Billings a lot, because it was the big city.  They even had a mall!   And everything this town doesn't have from many good restaurants to a city bus system.  From gambling, to sex stores.  From massages, I wasn't old enough to receive while I was a high schooler, to booze in  supermarkets.   From hookers to many many real jobs available.  
      Let me take time to break down the above paragraph a little more.   Montana does have gambling,  and I did a little while up north.  Mostly because we got to the motel way to early, I had no swim trunks for the pool, and I don't sit well.  I was happy that each gambling house offered free drinks while you gambled.  But that high quickly faded when I re-called that keno and video poker were the only offerings.  Can we say boring?   I was happy that I came out exactly even after my gambling run.  
     I before mentioned the seedy sex store my friend and I decided to visit while up that way.  This particular one is supposed to be a book store, and is located by the Motel 6's.  Yes plural.   It is very much like entering someones house as you walk inside.   And the shelves were plywood, covered with random toys.   I asked my friend, also a male, to enter five minutes before I did, so it did not look like we were together.   Anyways, near one of the viewing rooms was a great sign, I now wish I had a picture of.   Pleading with customers not to pee or leave other body fluids on the floors.   And telling about an STD that was now a huge problem in the city, and how you too could get tested cheaply.   Before we ran out of the building, to if nothing else wash our hands many many times.  I spotted an inflatable party sheep.   I have talked about this before, but now have a picture!   Even for Wyoming, this  is Baaaaad!
                                 And I am still wondering why the sheep is holding a beer!??

     We used to have way to much free time, and at night circle round the Hilton in downtown Billings.  After about twelve trips around the block, the local hookers would slowly come out of the woodwork, much like cockroaches.   We would flick pennies at them and than ask for our change back.   The only reason I mention this, is that I have been downtown Sheridan lately at night time.   They have lights up all over Main Street to support breast cancer.   And I am sure they are supposed to be pink, but they all look red.   And I am sorry, it looks just like I would picture a "red light district" would.  
    Soon after we got to town, we ate at Olive Garden.  Always a highlight of any trip.   I recall my ex being sure I was dumping her one night while we were eating at the restaurant.  As she kept pointing out how thick and heavy the plates were, and how much they would hurt, as she was throwing them at me.   My main response, through enjoying the food was that I would not go to such a snazzy and or expensive restaurant to break up with anyone.  No matter how great.  Mcdonalds maybe. 
    We roamed around town.   Having fun but not really doing anything.   At one point, while I was looking for a certain cigar, my buddy ended up buying a Zippo lighter.  Mainly it seems, to flick it open and lit the rest of the trip.   Anyways, while we were sitting in the car he attempted to light it for upwards to thirty minutes.   He handed it to me for advice, but I played dumb, yes I was playing dumb, thanks, and couldn't light it either.   He gave up and went back into the store.   Red faced he returned with the lighter filled with lighter fluid. 
    At some point we ended up at the mall to roam around.   Were we found a hurricane simulator booth.   I had hoped that the booth would soak and than blow you away.   But the winds in the both only hit about 80 miles an hour.  So a typical day in Casper, Wyoming.   Speaking of Casper, Reba the country singer is going to be singing there very soon.   Is she lost or something?   Anyways, it looked pretty lame, and I will have to wait till my next trip to Florida to experience the real thing I guess.

I do not have permission from anyone except myself to post this picture, so please to not stare at the person face!

   My only complaint about the motel room was the huge stain between the beds.   The only thing I know for sure, is that it wasn't anything flammable.  There had to be a reason he bought that Zippo!   I have issues with motel rooms in general so if at all possible I try to sleep in all my clothes on top of the sheets.  Or on top of the TV which ever looks cleaner.    Before I went out to roam the town we watched an awesome boxing match.   Were one of the boxers head butted the other.  While they were making up and shaking hands, the one that got head butted, threw in a couple sneak punches and dropped the other boxer.   It was awesome.   But like many things you would have to be there to enjoy it most.
     At one point we ended up at the movies.  It was still to warm out to do much.  And we had seen most of the stores that were close to interesting.   It was early afternoon and we ended up with a $5 movie.   As I bought my pop, I pulled out a five dollar bill, waiting for change.   The clerk needed more money.   I was more than a little surprised when my pop ended up costing more than the movie.  
     This was a very chill and not to eventful trip.   But as always it was great to just get out of town.  

                                          **"The best person I know lives in my mirror!"**

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