**"I hate it when I don't forward a chain letter --and I die the next day!"**
Good afternoon all!----I have another very late start on the day--because I am quickly going into another funk and find I can not sleep at night. Long story short, my wife and I are fighting again, nothing new really -but this is a big one. And I again found that instead of settling anything at all she just stops correspondence altogether. I have also again found that she makes all of the rules all of the time, because we are very into an equal relationship and all. I have been helping and fighting for things so much---that my classes and other areas are greatly struggling mostly that I now do not have reliable transportation once again. I thought I had help in all these areas, but nope----as I lay awake tonight---hoping that she comes by my house for a visit tomorrow ---I am going to use all this new found free time to my advantage and alternate between posting on my blog pages and studying. I believe I would have already dropped my management training classes--I am so far behind right now, if I did not know that I have to pay for the class if I flunk out or drop it. And the payment per week--is about the same amount as my paycheck. I believe this is now my sole motivator to stay in the class. This blog page alone has nearly 42,000 views now! So a huge than you to you all!! As a side thank you ---I really do attempt to keep my lack of a love life woes out of this page.
My main focus tonight will be my classes, but I also want to post away on my Exploring page. I have lots of new pictures and local Exploring to ramble on about. Please check out my old posts and share the link with everyone you know. http://exarizonagobensonbobcats.blogspot.com/
Among trying to catch up on a lot of things--in class --at home and beyond, I have been reading and enjoying many of my blog posts on this very page from the past. This page has been going strong for about five years now, and although a lot of it expresses pain and negativity---I believe much more of it show cases joy and happiness. I hope this is true for everyone that stumbles across the page and reads some of the random rambling. I even manage to slip up and get deep about topics every once in awhile. And in show casing my pictures, I can re see where I have been and watch our kiddos grow up as I maybe grow up a little bit in my writing, thoughts, rambling, and relationships. Notice the key word here is maybe. I have been told multiple times that all of this is a huge waste of time, but writing makes me happy---and Exploring and picture taking makes me even more happy. So writing it all down is a huge stress reliever for me at any time. Not to say my stress is near gone, at any rate right now. I would need a Costco box of enemas for myself and a huge amount of flowers to be stress free at this point. I have not been on a good hike or picture taking adventure for to long---living in a small as* apartment is also getting to me. I don't sit well normally, but lately that seems to be all I do. I just don't have the desire or motivation to Explore --and that is hard on my soul. Every time I start to believe that this very page really is a huge waste of time----I start reading the old posts and I soon get lost in the words and quickly find I have a huge smile on my face. My other deciding factor on how worthy this page is-----all of y'alls views! Again thank you.
I recently learned that I have a lot of paid time off built up at work----and with our tax refund coming soon---am going to start using much of it. As a server -paid time off is kind of a joke, because I still make $5.20 an hour----my main cash is defiantly in tips each work day. But this allows me to not be at work, but keep my paychecks the same low amount. Of course some of this time off is to be spent with my loved ones. If they start talking to me again. Much of it will be spent Exploring. And the pictures will make it on my pages soon after for sure. Speaking of work--after last week I am beyond lucky to still have a job even. More so because through all of this pain and crap---most of it self inflicted-work seems to be the only thing keeping me going each day. When I am stuck up here-away from my family on my daze off work like today---I just want to sleep the day away. Luckily my apartment complex is beyond loud and this is usually not an option. Today I do not choose to go into the work ordeal. Here are some funnies instead.....
On a high note----My long time Exploring buddy is moving closer to Arizona next month. I was going to fly up to his old home in Montana and help him move this way----to see him and get in a good road trip---but I am not sure time allows for this fun. Either rate he will soon be a hop skip and a jump away from here----Bad pictures and or injuries will result from this.
Mmmmm coffee another great love of mine.
My constant dream when I do manage to sleep at all.
Forever and a day
Although I am neither of the above at the moment.